Saturday, December 24, 2005

Grouch versus Nature - the sequel

I’m not sure what I did to piss off Mother Nature, but her minions seem to have been actively working against me here of late. The most recent episode started with an innocent turd inside the garage near the garage door. At first we thought it was the neighbor’s dachshund that got free (as it does frequently) and stuck in our garage. The next night I returned from a hockey game to find some things on the garage floor. When I went into the garage the next morning, Christmas Eve, there were flower pots broken with dirt and crud scattered all over the place. There was something in the garage.

I informed the family not to open the house door until I figured out what was in there. Grabbing my knife and a hockey stick I went into the garage and quickly found a cute ball of fur sleeping in the small trash can we keep leftover bags of soil in. I poked the thing with the hockey stick and the cute ball of fur turned into an ugly ‘possum baring its fangs at me.

To make a long story short, I tried for about fifteen minutes to usher the thing out of the garage. It wouldn’t go. Not wanting to risk injury to myself or my family I took a shovel to it. When the full weight of the shovel on its neck had no effect I chased it around the garage with a steel support beam. After about 25 minutes I got the thing out of the garage and off my property.

The opossum caused about thirty dollars worth of damage to flower pots and aquarium supplies. This was a lot less than the mouse that peed all over my subwoofer enclosure, but annoying nonetheless.

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